A Mission to Save Rainey

Well the mystery about Rainey disappearing has been solved. At least part of it. BucketheadCFO's little gofer UnaCrapper is finally making himself useful and found documents in HR Chick's office.

They sent him to some exectutive training camp for assholes. These corporate people kill me, don't they realize we needed an asshole with all these crazy women running around here. Hell, since he left we can't even get Buckethead out of the bed before 11:00 and I'm not sure of this, but I think Jane may have even killed a few people or at least arranged it. Unacrapper told me that Sharky tried to kill him several times and once almost succeeded! He poisoned him!

That nice lady outside that used to make us tamales? Gone. I'm guessing Waz knows something but since he hasn't shown up for work lately either, who knows. I aint saying a word, I don't want to be next.

So when Buckethead asked me to, I was totally a gung ho little squirrel about going on this mission to help Rainey out. I can't wait to tell him about Belinda and how she'd rather eat a honeybun than save my life. I'm keeping a list of shit to tell him about Belinda, trust me!

Wasn't till we got out to the "retreat" or compound or whatever they call it that she tells me that Rainey ordered me to smuggle some "communications equipment" into him. UP my ASS?!?!? I told her Oh hell no, but then I thought of Rainey up there feeding chickens and having no one to yell at and I felt so bad for him that I "took one for the team."

I got that thing called a "broadband card" out when I was in the visitor bathroom and managed to get that to Rainey. But I gotta tell you, I still don't feel "right" around there and I have terrible pain when I sit down. I can't exactly go to the doctor and splain to him about having a broadband card up my ass now can I ?!?

Maybe if I could get Belinda to put down her "Bear Claw" she could check things out for me but man I sure hate to ask her. She's got really big hands too. Damn Buckethead and her dumbass ideas. No one even searched our pockets when we visited Rainey, I think she had me do that just for her own entertainment.